🍽️ Waiter, Waiter!
There's a fly in every one of these soups. Tipping optional, groaning mandatory.
- Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Don't worry, sir — the spider on your bread will get him. NEW!
- Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! It's all right, sir, there's no extra charge. NEW!
- Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? Looks like the backstroke, sir.
- Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Keep your voice down, sir, or everyone will want one.
- Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup! Yes sir, they're terrible swimmers.
- Waiter, do you have frog legs? No sir, I always walk this way.
- Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud! Well sir, it was ground this morning.
- Waiter, will my pizza be long? No sir, it will be round.
- Waiter, how long will my sausages be? About four inches, sir.
- Waiter, I can't eat this soup! — I'll fetch the manager. — Manager, I can't eat this soup! — Why not, sir? — I don't have a spoon.
- Waiter, this egg is bad! Don't blame me, sir. I only laid the table.
- Waiter, your thumb is in my soup! That's quite all right, sir — it isn't hot.
- Waiter, is there soup on the menu? Not anymore, sir. I wiped it off.
- Waiter, this lobster only has one claw! It must have been in a fight, sir. — Then bring me the winner!
- Waiter, there's a twig in my soup! One moment, sir — I'll get the branch manager.
- Diner: 'Do you serve crabs here?' Waiter: 'We serve anyone, sir. Have a seat.'
- Waiter, I'd like a cup of coffee with no cream. — Sorry sir, we're out of cream. Could it be with no milk?